


Let's Talk About It

by FriendLey



Series: Five Years With You [9]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, I mean, Minor Carol Danvers/James "Rhodey" Rhodes, That's it, and by minor, hinted at - Freeform, only, they're not even together, this still follows canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-22
Updated: 2019-05-22
Packaged: 2020-03-09 12:13:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18916768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FriendLey/pseuds/FriendLey
Summary: Tony tells Rhodey about how much marriage changed things for him and Pepper which leads to them talking about other stuff.





	Let's Talk About It

The scotch was on the table. The lighting was a soft glow coming from one lamp beside the couch. Rhodey and Tony had just eaten dinner and were in the mood to do absolutely nothing but drink and talk, just like old times.

Rhodey smiled gratefully at Pepper (she made a wonderful meal) who had just finished clearing up in the kitchen and now walked over the threshold to the living room.

She stopped in front of Tony to ask, "Daddy, is she—"

"Bathed and sleeping."

Pepper made a satisfied sigh and leaned down, a hand on Tony's cheek, lips on his lips, tongue hot in his mouth—Tony moaned.

Rhodey quickly looked away, rolling his eyes. "Okay, power down, you two. Keep it in the bedroom."

Pepper pulled back, licking her lips. Tony's hands slid off her ass.

"I love you," she said before fixing Rhodey a stern look. "Not too late, gentlemen. I've got plans for that one," she said nodding at Tony who shifted.

She gave him one last sultry look and then Tony and Rhodey were left watching her go up the staircase.

"I love you too!" Tony remembered to say at the last minute, when he had successfully managed to take his eyes off his wife.

Rhodey gave Tony a confused look. "What the hell was that?"

Tony shrugged like Pepper making out with him in plain view of other people was normal. "She's ovulating."

"Ovulati—you didn't tell me you guys were trying again."

"We're not," said Tony, reaching for his glass of scotch and taking a sip. "She's just horny when she's ovulating."

Rhodey cringed. "I did  _not_  need to know that about your wife."

Tony shook his head at Rhodey. "Everybody knows that. That's science. You ovulate, your hormones are whack, you're horny—"

"Yes, but I did not need to know that my friend was currently in that state! Or the fact that that was her being, you know," he gestured with his hands, Tony frowned in confusion. He repeated the gesture Rhodes made and asked, "Is that supposed to mean sex?"

"No! You know what, I don't want to talk about this." Rhodey reached for his scotch and took a long swallow.

"You were the one who brought it up. You asked the question. Actually, now that we're talking about it, I do want to talk to you about Pepper."

Rhodey started shaking his head. He had a pretty good idea of what Tony wanted to talk about. "We're not gonna talk about—"

But Tony disregarded him. "You should get yourself a wife, is all I'm gonna say. Ever since Pepper and I got married—"

Rhodey leaned back against the arm of the sofa and sighed. "Aaannd you're talking about it."

Tony continued as if his best friend never spoke. "She just loves it when I do the simplest, domestic things. You saw how she reacted when I said I put Morgan to bed."

Rhodey shot Tony a warning look. There was only so much that he wanted to know.

Tony raised his hands, palms up. He chose his next words carefully. "Let's just say that the reward is great for he who washeth the dishes."

Rhodey was shaking his head at the mental image. "We eat in the kitchen! Can you stop? I am starting to picture Pepper in ways you don't want me imagining her. So, please, change topic."

Tony nodded. "Noted. Stopping now."

"Thank you."

"But can I just say—"

"Ugh," Rhodey groaned, letting his head fall back.

"Married life is great. You gotta get yourself a wife, man." Tony poured himself another round of scotch.

Rhodey handed him his glass too. "I gotta find a woman first." The right woman, he added mentally.

"How about Carol?" Tony asked, "She's a pilot."

"She's great. And also never around. So, you know…Thanks." Rhodey accepted the glass and settled comfortably in the couch again.

"That's true. But distance never stopped me and Pepper from—"

Rhodey knew exactly where this was heading and cut in before Tony could finish, "What did I say about oversharing?"

"It's not like you don't know all my dirty secrets. You've seen me naked—"

Rhodey gave Tony a deadpan look. "That's normal. Everyone's seen you naked." 

Sometimes,Tony could be so matter-of-fact about all of this.

"There's a difference between knowing about what you and your wife do and having you spell it out for me right here in your home where your daughter is sleeping one floor above us."

"She's a heavy sleeper. It's fine," said Tony, waving his hand dismissively. "But think about it. Carol."

"Even if I did, our comms aren't really private, you know. Try doing a long distance relationship with Natasha and Rocket in the background."

"Yeah, that could be a cockblocker," admitted Tony, then grinned at a passing thought. "I'll build you your own comm line! Unhackable. Just hit me up."

"I thought nobody says hack now?" Rhodey teased, referring to a time when Tony made that exact same remark to him a few years ago. "And why are we even talking about this? Carol is an amazing woman. I respect her and It's not even like that between us." They were colleagues. Nothing more.

Tony, unsurprisingly, wasn't one to give up. "It could be if you wanted it to. But if you're too scared to make a move—"

"I'm not scared."

"—there are tons of other women out there. I hear the young ones all like middle aged men, nothing illegal, they just want a sugar daddy to pay for college."

Rhodey had had enough of speaking about  _his_ lack of a love life and said, "Speaking of sugar daddy, what is up with Pepper calling you Daddy? Is that your kink?"

"What? No!" It was Tony's turn to cringe, his nose crinkling at Rhodey's insinuation. "Get your mind out of the gutter!"

"Who put it there?!"

"My daughter calls me daddy, what is wrong with you? You're defiling the title!"

"When your daughter calls you daddy, that's fine. But when your wife calls you daddy—"

"It's a thing parents do!" Tony defended, "I mean, you stop being Tony and Pepper in the house and you become Daddy and Mommy. I mean, every day it's like 'Mommy! Mommy! Daddy! Daddy!' Naturally, we were bound to start calling each other that!"

"Do you do that in bed?" Rhodey couldn't help but ask, enjoying how the tables have turned between the two of them.

Tony hit Rhodey with the back of his hand. "You're disgusting! You know what, get outta here." Tony rose, ushering a chuckling Rhodey up to the front door. "That's enough out of you. You kiss my daughter with that mouth?"

"You're one to talk! You did it in the kitchen where your daughter eats!" Tony lightly pushed Rhodey out to the porch, blocking the entryway so he couldn't get back in. Rhodey laughed again, accepting defeat. "Okay. Goodnight, man! Tell mommy I said goodnight."

Tony shook his head at him. "Don't do that."

"What?"

"Call her mommy."

" _You_ do!"

"Cause she's my wife! And when I do it, there's no underlying tone, but with you I can't tell—She's not—only Morgan and I—goodnight, Rhodes." Tony shut the door in his friend's face.

Through the screen, he could still see Rhodey grin smugly at him.

"Night, daddy."

**Author's Note:**

> I needed a fic where Tony and Pepper do that Parent Thing where they call each other mom and dad but this was the result. Please tell me that your parents do that too. If they don't, are they even parents?
> 
> Jsyk, this series will never be complete, because we need it go on FOREVER for the greater good. But also, updates won't be as frequent anymore because I have 2 plot bunnies left right now. So, if you guys want to help a sister out, feel free to give me topics to cover in the comments below. No promises I'll write them, but I'll try my best!


End file.
